Megan was like a bear with a sore foot for the next few days. She kept herself busy night and day between the farm work and running her company, not that she needed to do much on either side, but she found things to do. She once again tried to stay away from Charlie as far as possible, but she just couldn’t prevent herself from feeling anger and yearning at the same time. She eventually felt the need to speak to someone, so she went looking for Katrina who she found in her vegetable garden.
“Kat, can I speak to you?” she asked not really sure where to begin.
“You’re already speaking to me,” Katrina replied laughingly.
Megan had to smile. “You know what I mean Kat.”
Katrina stopped what she was doing and got up. “I was wondering when you were planning on opening up. Why don’t you grab that shovel over there and come and help me? Kevin wasn’t too impressed this morning when I chased him out of my garden. He seems to think I’m too old to be bending over.” Katrina laughed again shaking her head. “You would swear that I would break the way he went on, but I made it very clear that I’ve been attending to my vegetable garden while he was still sitting in the school benches. He seems to think that it supports his argument instead of mine.” Katrina removed the glove from one hand to push a strand of hair behind her ear. “There’s an extra pair of gloves next to the gate.”
Megan took the pair of working gloves and picked up the shovel as she walked towards Katrina. “My mother would never have been caught dead near a garden, never mind a vegetable garden. You’re an amazing person Kat.”
“Thanks, but I prefer to think that I’m just normal. You can start on that side. I need a trench all the way to the bottom of that row.” Katrina showed Megan where the trench needed to be before returning to what she was busy with. “I take it this conversation is going to be about Charlie?”
Megan looked up quickly, but only saw concern in Katrina’s eyes. “I’m starting to think you know me better after only a few months than my mother who knew me for years.” Megan sighed. “I just don’t understand what I’m going through. I thought it was lust, and then I thought it was my bruised ego, and now I just don’t know. I want her so much, but she also manages to make me so angry. I’ve never been so out of control when it comes to my emotions. I’ve always been in control. I started relationships when I felt like it, and I ended them when I felt it was over. I must admit though that my relationships were more about a physical need than anything else. I also have to admit to myself that I’m jealous for the first time in my life. This is so unlike me. I’m feeling helpless, and I swore that I’d never feel that again. It’s not the same thing as all those years ago, but the helpless feeling is the same.”
The more Megan talked the deeper she was pushing the shovel into the ground. Katrina saw this, but knew that it was a good thing. Working out the anger she felt was better than her lashing out at everyone the way she had been doing the last few days. “Do you think it’s love?”
“Love is a feeling of weakness, and I prefer not to feel it.”
“That’s where you’re wrong Megan. You can’t decide to feel or not feel love. You just feel it. Love is a beautiful thing.”
“No it’s not. Love equals pain and disappointment.”
“Are you referring to Christine?”
“Yes. It wasn’t just the feeling of helplessness that upset me so much. She was like a sister and best friend rolled into one. She gave me the love that nobody else did, and what did I do?”
“Megan, we spoke about this before. You need to work through your feeling of guilt. I know that your dreams haven’t stopped, and also that they won’t stop until you deal with this. Love is a beautiful thing, and there are many levels of it. I’m sure that even after Christine’s death you have loved people in various ways. There is your aunt for instance. She loved you very much and wanted to help you. I’m sure you loved her in a way. Then there are all the people on this farm. You’ve been here for a few months already. I’m sure if you really think about it, you would realise what you feel for these people. You can’t tell me that those two kids haven’t climbed into your heart with their dirty little feet and all.” Katrina had a smile on her face thinking about Harry and Rebecca running though her kitchen with their dirty feet leaving marks all over the floor. “I’ve seen you with them. Those were not the actions of a person that’s indifferent to them. You just can’t see it because you don’t think you deserve to feel or receive love.”
Megan stopped what she was doing and just stared at the ground. “So, you’re saying that what I’m feeling towards Charlie is love, even though I don’t want to feel it?”
“I’m saying it’s a possibility. All the signs are there, and once again you can’t dictate love. It has a way of biting you in the butt when you try.”
Megan’s face was a picture of confusion. “So, a little thing like love can make me feel all these emotions and cause all this confusion?”
“You should never underestimate love. The strongest of people has fallen because of it, but it has also lifted the weaker ones to victory. Love can make you weak or strong, it just depends on what you do with it. Do yourself a favour and just accept it as a possibility, and see where it takes you.”
“Thanks Kat. If I had had people like you in my younger years, I might have turned out as a better person.”
“You can only blame your behaviour on others for so long. What you make of the circumstances is what moulds you. Everyone is different and all will react differently. You can be a victim for the rest of your life, or you can chose not to be. You can also choose to use other people or be supportive of them, but once you become the supportive and uplifting one, it takes you even higher. Also remember it’s never too late to change.”
Megan smiled at Katrina. “You should have been my psychologist all those years ago.”
“I’m just glad that I can help you now.”
Megan took her gloves off as she walked towards Katrina with tears starting to run down her face. “You are an extraordinary person Kat, never mind what you think about being ordinary.” When she reached her Megan wrapped her arms around Katrina and just held on to her as the tears fell.
As the days went by Megan became calmer. She was only now learning to understand her own heart, and it was a scary feeling for her. Everyone could see the change and welcomed it, although they did wonder about it, especially Charlie. Megan seemed to be trying to spend more time in her company, but Charlie was wary. She knew what she felt for Megan was love, but decided not to force anything. She was very glad that the dreams became less frequent again.
One evening Katrina walked into the study where Charlie was catching up on some paperwork. “Do you know it’s Megan’s birthday in two days?”
“No, how did you find out?”
“I might be old, but I have my ways,” Katrina grinned.
“So what do you think we should do about it?” Charlie closed the book she was working in.
“I thought that we might have a spitbraai on Saturday afternoon and invite all the people that she has met in the last few months including the farm workers. I don’t think we should invite Allison though.”
“Oh, and why not?” Charlie feigned innocence.
“Don’t you start something Charlie. You were present at their last interaction. Do you want a cat fight?”
“Well now, that could be interesting!” Charlie had a huge grin on her face.
“Don’t you even dare!”
“Ahhh, but it could be fun.”
“Charlene Palmer, you will not find amusement at the expense of Megan.”
“Wow, I’m just joking.”
“Then stop joking and let’s start planning.” Katrina sat down opposite Charlie.
After a while they’d finished all the planning and just had to put it into action the next day. “Remember not to say anything to her,” Katrina said as she walked out of the study.
“Now the only question is what am I going to get her?” Charlie said out loud. She pulled the paperwork towards her again and continued her work. By the time she had finished she knew exactly what she wanted to give to Megan. She switched off the light and walked up the stairs with a smile on her face.
Saturday morning Megan awoke feeling a bit disappointed. It was her birthday and no one knew about it. The previous years she had normally organised a birthday party for her friends to attend at her expense.
She got dressed and walked down to the dining room, but didn’t find anybody there. She went into the kitchen looking for Katrina, but she wasn’t there either. She was still looking around when she heard a commotion just outside the front door. She walked out onto the porch to find Katrina and all the farm workers standing on the porch and Charlie walking towards them leading a beautiful black horse.
“What’s all the commotion about?” Megan asked from the door. Everyone fell silent when they realised Megan stood there. Nobody said a word until Charlie stopped in front of the porch with the horse.
“You can do the honours Charlie,” Katrina said when Charlie gestured that she should speak.
“I only got a doll on my birthday,” Rebecca whispered to her brother, but it was loud enough for everyone to hear, including Megan. It was dead silent for a second before Katrina burst out laughing and everybody else did the same. Megan stood there flabbergasted.
“Happy birthday Megan,” Charlie eventually said when she stopped laughing. “Her name is Melody, and she’s a two year old filly.”
Megan walked down the porch steps towards Charlie and the horse without saying a word. When she got to them Charlie handed her some sugar cubes. “Sorry, this one’s got a sweet tooth like mine.”
Megan gave Melody the sugar cubes and ran her hand down the front of her head. “What am I suppose to do with a horse?” she asked Charlie in a whisper.
“I think the idea is to ride on her,” Charlie whispered back with a smile.
Megan turned to the people behind her. “Thank you all very much.”
“That’s not all you’re getting,” Rebecca happily shouted out.
Everyone laughed again. “With this child around, no secret is safe. It’s a good thing she only found out this morning,” Kathy apologised.
“So what else am I getting or shouldn’t I risk asking?” Megan was enjoying the situation.
“We’re having a spitbraai this afternoon!” Harry yelled out in excitement, not allowing his sister to have all the fun.
“A spitbraai?” Megan asked with a puzzled expression.
Charlie looked at her with shock. “You can’t tell me that you’re a South African and don’t know what a spitbraai is?”
“Yes I can. So what is it?” Everyone laughed causing Megan’s cheeks to turn red.
“Do you know what rotisserie chicken is?” Charlie asked.
“Well, we’ll be doing that to a whole sheep over hot coals.”
Megan had a shocked expression on her face. “You have a barbeque that big?”
“Yes we do, and we’ve invited everyone you know from around here. By the way, around here you better talk about a braai and not a barbeque. People will think you’re foreigner.”
“You’ve invited everyone?” Megan asked apprehensively.
Charlie bent down and whispered in Megan’s ear. “Don’t worry Megan, Allison wasn’t invited.” She pulled back and Megan could see the amused gleam in her eyes.
Megan glared at her in mock anger and whispered back, “Won’t you be a bit lonely tonight then?”
Charlie looked deep into Megan’s green eyes for what felt like an eternity. Megan swallowed deep unable to tear her eyes away. Charlie placed her hand at the small of Megan’s back before she whispered again, “No, I have everything I could ever want right here.” She left her hand there for a few more seconds before she pulled her hand away and took the reins from Megan’s unmoving fingers. “What do you say you and I go for a ride?”
Megan was still in a state of shock at Charlie’s words and didn’t respond. Charlie took it as a no. “Fine, I’ll take Melody back to the stable then.”
“No!” Megan almost shouted out. Everyone fell silent at the outburst. They were looking from Megan to Charlie and back.
“I mean, yes, let’s go for a ride.”
Charlie smiled and the rest of the people went back to their own conversations.
Charlie and Megan were stealing glances at each other when they thought the other one wasn’t looking. They’d been riding around for about half an hour already, and the atmosphere between them was tense, but for completely different reasons than ever before. They eventually came to the same spot next to the river where they had stopped before. Megan suggested they get off and give the horses a chance to drink some water. She had a sly smile on her face when she turned away from Charlie.
Charlie turned and led Mobius to the water expecting Megan to do the same, but instead she heard a slap and then the sound of a horse running. She spun around to see Melody already heading back the way they had come, and Megan standing there with a way too innocent look on her face.
“Oops. I guess she’s a bit jumpy. It looks like you will have to give me a ride back home again.”
Charlie was dumbfounded.
“I promise I won’t be kicking and screaming this time.”
Charlie still couldn’t get herself to speak, or do anything else for that matter. She knew Megan had chased Melody away on purpose, but didn’t want to allow herself the luxury of imagining why.
“We could even ride a bit more. We don’t have to head home straight away. I’m sure there is still plenty to see on this farm that I’ve never been able to reach with the truck,” Megan said, still the picture of innocence.
“Uhm… I guess I can take you to see the little cabin halfway up the hill on the south side.” Charlie didn’t know why she had even mentioned the cabin. It was her sanctuary, and apart from Katrina and Claire, no one else had ever been there.
“A cabin sounds interesting. Is that where you disappear to every now and then?”
“Yes, it’s got an amazing view of the farm.” Charlie got her verbal ability back completely. She didn’t want to hope for too much, so she was planning on playing it cool and just acting like nothing was wrong. “Come on then. Let me help you onto Mobius.”
Megan shook her head from side to side. “I prefer to sit behind you if you don’t mind. I’ll feel a lot more secure there, and I think I will enjoy the ride much more.”
Charlie felt a tingling feeling running down her spine at the way Megan let the word ‘ride’ run off her tongue. She shook her head slightly. “Your mind is playing games with you again. Don’t presume or hope for anything,” Charlie scolded herself.
“What’s wrong Charlie? Don’t you want me to ride on the back?”
Charlie shook her head again. “Yes… uhm… I mean no… Oh fuck. I mean yes, you can ride wherever you feel comfortable.”
Megan smiled. “Thank you, the back it is then.”
Charlie mounted Mobius before extending her hand to help Megan up effortlessly to sit behind her. She stiffened slightly when Megan’s hands came to rest on her hips. All she could do was pray for strength.
As they were riding, Megan’s hands began to travel, but she did it very slowly and lightly. She moved her hands slightly to the front and left them there for a while, but eventually started moving them up until they were brushing Charlie’s breasts. She could feel the effect she was having on her as she felt Charlie shiver slightly underneath her hands. She became bolder and cupped her breasts lightly while pushing herself against Charlie’s back, who froze for a second before relaxing into the embrace. Charlie could feel Megan’s hard nipples pressing into her back, and she didn’t care anymore. She had been trying to control herself for so long, but she just couldn’t anymore.
“Let her use me, I don’t care. At least I will have something to hold onto when she’s gone.” Charlie gave up on her internal battle.
Megan felt Charlie’s surrender as she pressed back into Megan’s embrace. This was all the encouragement she needed. She cupped Charlie’s breasts more firmly and let her fingers play with the nipples through her shirt and bra. They were hard in no time, and she moaned as she felt herself straining against her clothes. She could feel a pulse start deep within her. She was very thankful that Mobius was lazily walking along on the way to the cabin, for there was no way that she could stay in control and steer him.
Megan felt slightly frustrated at being short, but it didn’t last very long. She pulled Charlie further back into her embrace and kissed her on the back of her neck. Charlie moaned as Megan worked her way up towards her ear to kiss and play with her earlobe before she sucked it into her mouth and slightly bit on it. That sent another shiver down Charlie’s body, but it did the same for Megan. She smiled before she made her way to the other ear. She let her hands move down, and just as she was about to suck the other earlobe into her mouth she cupped Charlie’s mound, who took in a deep, loud breath at the simultaneous pleasure. Megan rubbed her hand up and down with her middle finger applying more pressure than the others. As she continued her assault on Charlie’s neck and mound, Megan used her other hand to undo the buttons on Charlie’s jeans. Once open, she slid her hand in to find a very wet and warm welcome.
Charlie was beside herself. She had never felt anything like it. Her hands were limply holding onto the reins with no purpose at all. The only thing she was capable of was moaning at every new sensation, and there were so many of them. While Megan’s lips were moving from one side of her neck to the other, her right hand was teasing her nipples in turn and her left hand was buried in her heat. With this, there was also the movement of the horse that was making her rub against the saddle. She never stopped moaning.
Megan let her fingers push deeper into Charlie. She spread the wetness over Charlie’s clit, and then pulled it slightly. Charlie bucked forward, but Megan held her back. She stroked and pulled, working Charlie into a frenzy. She kept her movements synchronised with those of the horse. This caused her hand to be pressed harder into Charlie’s mound whenever they moved forward. It didn’t take very long before Charlie stiffened in the saddle. Megan kept her hand buried in Charlie’s heat feeling the ripples running through her. Charlie slumped backwards, letting the back of her head rest on Megan’s shoulder. “What are you doing to me?” she asked in a hoarse voice.
“Making you realise how much I want you and want to be with you.” Megan kissed the side of Charlie’s face.
“We still have three more months in which you can convince me some more.” Charlie sighed. “I know I said before that I couldn’t allow you to use me until you leave, but I was wrong. I’m willing to be used.”
Megan pulled Charlie even closer to her. “I don’t want to use you, I want to stay with you.”
Charlie bolted up and pulled the reins causing Mobius to stop, and then turned in the saddle. “What did you say?”
Megan laughed. “I said I want to stay with you. I don’t want to leave the farm. I want to see where this will go, and I want you to kiss me.”
Charlie looked around to see exactly where they were. “Can you hold that thought for two minutes and hold on tight to me? As much as I enjoyed our little ride, I need to get somewhere more comfortable.”
Megan nodded and held on tight to Charlie as Mobius went into a sprint.
About two minutes later they stopped in front of the cabin. “Welcome to my sanctuary. It is small, but comfortable. Claire encouraged me to build it when I started working here. She knew I needed a place to escape to, away from everyone and everything. I don’t use it that much anymore, but right now I am very pleased that it’s here.”
Megan had a wicked little smile on her face. “What size bed do you have in there?”
“That’s for me to know and for you to find out.” Charlie pulled Megan into her arms. “But first things first.” She brought her mouth down to Megan’s in a scorching kiss that left them both ready to strip from the heat.
Charlie grabbed Megan’s hand and pulled her into the cabin where she pinned her to the door after closing it. “You’re so beautiful,” she whispered into Megan’s ear as she kissed her down her neck. She pulled Megan up into her arms and guided her legs around her hips, but Megan didn’t need much encouragement. Charlie grinding her body into hers, and kissing her senseless, was something she was longing for.
Between kissing her, Charlie removed Megan’s shirt and bra. She held onto her and turned towards the bed and moved slowly towards it. She never stopped kissing Megan. When she felt the side of the bed against her knees, she pulled her leg up to bring her knee down on the bed before she lowered them both onto it. Once on the bed, Charlie kissed her way down Megan’s body while bringing her nipples to a stand with her hands. When she reached the top of Megan’s jeans, she used both hands to unbutton them while quickly moving up for another heart-stopping kiss. She moved back down again, pulling Megan’s jeans and underwear down in one movement. Megan grabbed hold of the bedcover with both hands when Charlie breathed upon her. She spread her legs slightly more to give Charlie better access, and when Charlie drove her tongue into her wetness she bucked upward, balling her hands into fists around the bed linen. Charlie used only her tongue. She licked Megan like an ice cream cone, and then stiffened her tongue to put pressure onto her clit. She ran it down the side of the shaft, and then into the folds to end up pushing it into her. She kept on bringing Megan close to the edge this way, and then pulling away to blow hot air onto her already heated centre.
Megan cried out in frustration, “Please….”
Charlie just smiled and hummed as she licked Megan again. The sensation sent Megan over the edge. Charlie rode the storm with her, and when they calmed down she kissed her way up again and enfolded Megan in her arms.
After a while Megan opened her eyes and looked at the surroundings she never saw when they entered. “Wow, a cabin with a king size bed.”
Charlie kissed her softly and smiled “Anything smaller would have my feet sticking out, but looking at the condition of the bedding, I’m sure that you must also need one. You might be small, but you sure make good use of space.”
“What else could I have done with such a talented tongue working its magic on me?” She ran her hand through Charlie’s long hair.
“I would love to show you what else it can do, but we need to get back. Your party is about to start in an hour. I’m sure Kat is already wondering where we are.”
“No she’s not.”
“And why not?” Charlie’s right eyebrow lifted slightly.
“Because she’s the one that suggested I get you to show me the cabin, after she told me that you where the one that bought Melody and I said that I wanted to thank you in a very special way.”
“Am I going to get thanked for organising the spitbraai as well?” Charlie wiggled her eyebrows.
“Oh yes, but I think you need to come to my room tonight for that thank you.”
“That’s a date then.” Charlie gave Megan another kiss that left her breathless. “But until that time, we will be dancing the night away, so we need to get going.”
When they got home Katrina welcomed them with a big smile on her face. From the way they were sitting on Mobius when they arrived at the house, she could see that Megan’s plan had worked. “You got what you wanted Claire,” she whispered into the wind.
The spitbraai was a major success. Megan enjoyed it so much she made Charlie promise that they would do it again soon. By the time everyone had eaten the sun was setting, so all the lights were switched on and the music started playing. Couples were heading towards the dance floor and Megan grabbed Charlie’s hand.
“Miss Palmer, I believe we have a date on the dance floor,” she said seductively.
“Well Miss Callaway, I believe you’re right.” They made their way to the floor where they encircled each other’s waists. Megan had already organised with the DJ to play as many slow songs as possible. The other people didn’t seem to mind either. Charlie and Megan’s bodies moved together as if one. They only had eyes for each other, and their hands moved over each other as much as possible without giving the people around them too much to see; there were children there as well after all.
They were still dancing together when Katrina came towards them with another person at her side. “Megan, here’s someone who came all the way from the city to congratulate you on your birthday.”
Megan looked up and went pale. “Kelly….”
Charlie let go of her to see who she was looking at.
“Megan, darling. I’ve missed you so much. My bed has been so empty without you, that I decided to take you up on your invitation and join you here in this godforsaken place until the year is over.” She rushed over to the shocked Megan and pulled her into a kiss.
Megan stood wide-eyed and motionless while Kelly kissed her. The only thing she was focused on was the hurt look on Charlie’s face, and then her back as she turned around and walked away.